A Note To All...THANK YOU!

I shouldn't write this while I am so tired because I am afraid I am going to forget someone.  There have been a lot of wonderful people who have been awesome helping our family during our time of sorrow.  To everyone who wrote, emailed, called, blogged, facebooked, came to the visitation, funeral or stopped by the house I want to say THANK YOU!  There are too many of you to thank individually.  The amount of food that people dropped off could have fed an army.  We didn't need to cook much all week.  Lynn had many friends and family that loved her.  There are literally hundreds of people that were personally touched by Lynn.   


Thank you Judy Avis and daughter Paulette Hearn.  You both are true friends through thick and thin.  I know it means a lot to my mom that you both were there for her during a most difficult time.  To Lynn's friends that have been there forever like Amy Adams-Whitaker and Teresa Beers, you guys are the best.  The memorial at Buffalo Wild Wings was very touching. Thank you Amy for helping me pick out the music.  The song "I Can Only Imagine" by Mercy Me will always be a special memory for me.  I don't know if I can listen to the song in the future without crying.  I didn't know Amanda Tandle but she is the creator of the facebook page RIP Lynn Culberson-Mota and Amy and Teresa are the administrators. So many message have been left on Lynn's facebook page and her tribute page, I still haven't had time to read them all. Andrew's friend, Sarah Rosales, age 10, sang the most beautiful version of "I Will Remember You".  Girl, you have a beautiful voice. When you are old enough to quit your day job, go for it.  You can sing professionally. Thank you to my cousins Sherry, Candi, Dona and Jordin for coming from Missouri and Pennsylvania.  Everytime we are together I laugh and laugh.  How many Culbersons does it take to figure out how to set up a television?  The entire class and several instructors from Northeast Iowa Community College came for the visitation and funeral.  Wow!  Thank you to Kimmy Sloman who read the beautiful poem that she posted on Lynn's facebook.   Thank you Aunt Dorothy and Uncle Dean for finding the poem on Lynn's facebook and bringing it to our attention. A special thank you to Scott Reggentin, Lynn's study buddy and close ally in the nursing program.  Your stories about Lynn will keep me going for a long time. Please keep in touch.  


Last, but most important, my nephews Andrew and Alex, you deserve the biggest thank you. You two have been very brave facing the death of your mother.  Remember, your Aunt Deana said your mom's spirit will live on your hearts. Nothing will ever take that away from you. 

Five Stages of Grief

My B.A. is Elementary Education but I have a minor in psychology.  I've always said I know just enough about psychology to make an improper diagnosis of my family members' problems.  Examples include OPD (obnoxious personality disorder) and LDS (laundry deficiency syndrome).  The latter came from my ex-husband's inability to do laundry.  He used to throw our sons' bunched up socks along with untreated stains in the washing machine.  I finally begged him to stop washing clothes when he threw my very expensive Amana wool coat that was to be dry cleaned ONLY into the washing machine. One thing I remember from my psychology classes is the Kubler-Ross model, AKA the 5 stages of grief; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.  


I AM PISSED.  There are a lot of idiots in this world.  Here are a few examples of them.


Example #1 -  Youdonut wrote in response to the Cedar Rapids Gazette's article about my sister's fatal accident:


February 25, 2010 at 4:36 am Glad to hear that none of the bus occupants were injured. It would be interesting to find out if it was a distracted driver though. Pretty hard not to see a stopped bus with lights flashing. Not to be pedantic, but that looks like a 2000 or 2001 Saturn L series station wagon. I've seen it around town before.


Dear Youdonut, Thank you for your condolences.  Your words are so comforting.  I will agree it is good news that none of the bus occupants were injured. My sister would have never hurt a flea let alone school children.  One time my sister found baby bunnies in the backyard.  She made my dad build a box around the bunnies so the crows wouldn't kill the bunnies.

Example #2 - Tetra021 wrote in the Des Moines Register:

Replying to nokrapt:

That is a horrifying photo. Prayers to her family.

At least you don't have to see what the aftermath on her was. Hopefully she's not too messed up to be an open casket funeral.

Dear Tetra021,  I am a little more concerned about the 2 motherless boys, age 11 and 5, that my sister is leaving behind than whether or not we can have an open casket funeral.  


Example #3 - Dajones wrote to the Des Moines Register:


OK, I'm game.
 Assuming she wasn't drunk, what would distract you to the point where you would miss a big, bright yellow school bus with big flashing yellow lights?
 I think it would be a great idea to check the cell phones records of people involved in wrecks to see if they were texting or talking on their cell phones when the wreck occured.


Dear Dajones,  My sister did not drink so you can safely assume she wasn't drunk.  It was 3:30 in the afternoon and she was coming home from a long day at nursing school. She was a hard working mother trying to make a better life for herself and her boys.  And the state trooper did check the cell phone record.  She was NOT texting or talking.   It seems you and several other idiots ASSUMED she was using her cell phone.  I could have told you she was a very responsible driver and never used her cell phone while driving, but the state trooper's report is conclusive.  It is public report.  Check it out if you don't believe me. 


Example #4 - Verymad wrote to the Des Moines Register:


Was the phone call worth it?
2/24/2010 9:12:44 PMDear Verymad,  I dare you to say that to my face, you fucking coward. I've got a diagnosis for you. If being an asshole is a disease, you probably can get your insurance company to pay for an assholectomy.  I'll be at the visitation today and the funeral tomorrow.  You know where to find me.  Say it to my face.  It'll be the last thing you ever say.  

RIP, my beautiful baby sister Lynn Marie Culberson Mota

Yesterday afternoon my sister Lynn was driving home from nursing school.  We suspect she fell asleep at the wheel and crashed into the back of a school bus. None of the children were hurt.  My sister was killed instantly.  My dad and I drove to Iowa in 22 1/2 hours and we arrived tonight.

To my beautiful baby sister... I will miss our chats. I will miss your wicked sense of humor. Most of all, I can't imagine a family gathering without you. I love you. RIP Lynnie the Pooh.

Rumors and Reality - Mexican Drug Wars

Mostly what I've been hearing are rumors.  The following statements are true.  It is true that this morning I started with 4 out of 33 students although 2 showed up really late for a total of 6.  It is true that today is somewhat beautiful so I took my 6 students outside to study.  It is true that a secretary came running at us and yelled to get inside.  It is also true that a caravan of trucks carrying face-covered, gun-wielding thugs drove by the school followed by face-covered, gun-wielding soldiers.  I didn't see them but the PE teacher did and so did the security guard at another high school next door to us.  Tell me again, what the hell I am doing here in Reynosa?

Balaceras, Bitching and Blah, Blah, Blah

UPDATE to my previous UPDATE - Today only 4 of my 33 students showed up for class.  Below is a noteworthy sign.  It says, ''Reynosa is a secure city.  Nothing will happen nor nothing will happen. Return to your normal life. We are a part of Tamaulipas (the state) and we are not going to mess with the citizens.  Signed by the C.D.G.''  (the Golf Cartel aka one of the gangs that is causing this mess).  I thought this was a joke.  But my coworker says it is probably not a joke because no one messes with the drug cartel and signs their name.  What the hell am I doing here especially since I have barely any students to teach?

If you don't like bitching, then you might as well quit reading now.  Lately it's not been fun to be in Reynosa.  OK, it's been less fun than the usual not so much fun.  Last Thursday at 11 AM one of the office ladies came to collect a student. I thought he must have a doctor appointment or something. Then I started hearing the loudspeaker calling student names.  Uh-oh!  That only happens at the end of the day when parents come to get their children.  I had just started grammar lessons when all of this started.  I stepped outside the door to ask what's going on when I was informed that parents are coming to get children because of a threat.  Long story short, by the end of the day I only had 2 students left. And the grammar lesson?  Yeah, right. On Friday only 4 of 33 showed up. The federal schools closed but not us. Supposedly there was a threat directed at students by the drug cartels if the soldiers didn't get out of town.  Other rumors involved a middle school and hostages being taken.  We never know what is the truth because NOTHING is reported in the newspaper or the television news.  In fact, the best news source is Twitter.  After a week of nervous waiting behind locked doors and keeping our heads low, nothing really happened. 


Next bitch is about McDonald's salads. Last night I went to the drive-up window at McDonalds to order an ensalada crispy. In the United States, you would get a salad with lettuce, tomato, cucumbers, carrots and cheese topped with chicken.  And ranch dressing.  In Mexico, the salad includes wilty lettuce with a couple of sad tomatoes with a chintzy bit of chicken.  And no ranch dressing.  WTF?  I paid $50 pesos for that crap!  Now if I could only learn to effectively complain in Spanish. 


And the last blah, blah, blah has nothing to do with Reynosa or Mexico.  It's about my Mastercard.  Last November the fraud department called me wanting to know if I charged like $700 to Home Depot in Florida. No, I did not.  At that point it goes to fraud investigations and the credit card is cancelled. They sent me a new card.  I've rarely used the old card in Mexico but I decided I will no longer use the Mastercard in Mexico in case someone is stealing my information.  I get the new card and everything is going along swimmingly when I get another phone call last Thursday wanting to know if I charged like $700 to Home Depot in Florida.  Double WTF?  The same amount from the same store but on my new card.  My card is in my possession and no one else has access to it.  Again, they cancel it to issue me a new one.  And I never, ever used this last one in Mexico. Ever.  But today tops all.  In the middle of class time, the fraud investigator calls me and tells me he has put my new card on hold.  Then he proceeds to treat me like the criminal.  He told me I would have to send picture ID's of everyone in my household.  Uh, that would be ME. He said someone I know has used the card. He tells me that I've been issued a new card 5 times in the past year and that raised a red flag.  I have not been issued a new card 5 times in the past  year so I don't know how he is getting his information. When I questioned him about this he refused to answer me. When I asked what is his name and ID, he refused to supply.  In final frustration, I asked to speak to his supervisor and he refused that and hung up on me.  So now I am thinking, FRAUD, FRAUD!!   When I got home, I called Mastercard and was put through to the fraud department.  Yes, some dickhead named Don did call me from their fraud department that morning.  I put in a formal complaint about him and told them I refuse to deal with him so they better transfer the case to another investigator.  I was promised a supervisor would call me.  Stay tuned for updates. 


UPDATE:  Only 9 of 16 students showed up for the morning class and 12 of 17 for the afternoon class.  Another gun battle last night. This afternoon my students were being pulled out of classes because supposedly 2 university students and 3 teachers have been kidnapped.  As always we only hear rumors.  When will the madness all end?

Best Friends Forever

I have the best friends. I really do.  These are the kind of friends that I can count on for anything.  I want to thank them very much for the "cleaning" they did at my house tonight.  Hey, guys, the candle is still burning. But, dang it, we forgot the tarot cards!  Oh, well, maybe we can get together this weekend and finish what we started. I hope they know if they need ANYTHING, I will be there for them.

Great lyrics from the great movie, Austin Powers.....

Call me.
Don't be afraid, you can
Call me.
Maybe it's late, but just
Call me.
Tell me and I'll be around.


**UPDATE**  That candle was still burning at 6:30 this morning.  What does that mean?  Too much evil to burn away??

Noisy Neighbors and Rotten Tomatoes

As I sit here at 10:44 PM on a Wednesday night listening to my neighbor's noisy party complete with norteño music pumped up to the max, I realize it could be worse.  It could have been one of their karaoke parties with norteño music pumped up to the max while they sing loudly off-key.  I swear one night in the recent past I was picking fruits and vegetables out of my refrigerator so I could start launching missiles from my bedroom window.  That's no joke, folks.  Don't these people realize I have to get up at 5:30 AM?  Do these people care?  Am I asking retarded rhetorical questions? Their parties usually start after 10 PM and can go on until 3 in the morning.

Paybacks can be hell.  Other revenge plots have crossed my mind.  What would they think of loud Czech polka music blaring from my bedroom window at 5:30 AM?  Nah, not a good idea. It sounds too much like norteño music so they'd probably like it. Seriously, folks, the so-called Mexican music with the accordion is not really Mexican at all.  It came from the German and Czech immigrants to northern Mexico.  And the Mexicans have the nerve to brand it as their own!  If you don't believe me, google it.

Anyway, I thought I finally got my revenge last Saturday night at my patio party.  After a couple or ten rounds of tequila (who's counting?) the final encore of the night was a very loud and off-key sing-along with Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody around 2 AM. That oughta fix those noisy neighbors except now my throat hurts and my voice is hoarse. And they are back to partying again. Who got the last laugh?  Not me, I guess, but I've an assortment of tomatoes and oranges ready to be launched.