RIP, my beautiful baby sister Lynn Marie Culberson Mota

Yesterday afternoon my sister Lynn was driving home from nursing school.  We suspect she fell asleep at the wheel and crashed into the back of a school bus. None of the children were hurt.  My sister was killed instantly.  My dad and I drove to Iowa in 22 1/2 hours and we arrived tonight.

To my beautiful baby sister... I will miss our chats. I will miss your wicked sense of humor. Most of all, I can't imagine a family gathering without you. I love you. RIP Lynnie the Pooh.

Rumors and Reality - Mexican Drug Wars

Mostly what I've been hearing are rumors.  The following statements are true.  It is true that this morning I started with 4 out of 33 students although 2 showed up really late for a total of 6.  It is true that today is somewhat beautiful so I took my 6 students outside to study.  It is true that a secretary came running at us and yelled to get inside.  It is also true that a caravan of trucks carrying face-covered, gun-wielding thugs drove by the school followed by face-covered, gun-wielding soldiers.  I didn't see them but the PE teacher did and so did the security guard at another high school next door to us.  Tell me again, what the hell I am doing here in Reynosa?

Balaceras, Bitching and Blah, Blah, Blah

UPDATE to my previous UPDATE - Today only 4 of my 33 students showed up for class.  Below is a noteworthy sign.  It says, ''Reynosa is a secure city.  Nothing will happen nor nothing will happen. Return to your normal life. We are a part of Tamaulipas (the state) and we are not going to mess with the citizens.  Signed by the C.D.G.''  (the Golf Cartel aka one of the gangs that is causing this mess).  I thought this was a joke.  But my coworker says it is probably not a joke because no one messes with the drug cartel and signs their name.  What the hell am I doing here especially since I have barely any students to teach?

If you don't like bitching, then you might as well quit reading now.  Lately it's not been fun to be in Reynosa.  OK, it's been less fun than the usual not so much fun.  Last Thursday at 11 AM one of the office ladies came to collect a student. I thought he must have a doctor appointment or something. Then I started hearing the loudspeaker calling student names.  Uh-oh!  That only happens at the end of the day when parents come to get their children.  I had just started grammar lessons when all of this started.  I stepped outside the door to ask what's going on when I was informed that parents are coming to get children because of a threat.  Long story short, by the end of the day I only had 2 students left. And the grammar lesson?  Yeah, right. On Friday only 4 of 33 showed up. The federal schools closed but not us. Supposedly there was a threat directed at students by the drug cartels if the soldiers didn't get out of town.  Other rumors involved a middle school and hostages being taken.  We never know what is the truth because NOTHING is reported in the newspaper or the television news.  In fact, the best news source is Twitter.  After a week of nervous waiting behind locked doors and keeping our heads low, nothing really happened. 


Next bitch is about McDonald's salads. Last night I went to the drive-up window at McDonalds to order an ensalada crispy. In the United States, you would get a salad with lettuce, tomato, cucumbers, carrots and cheese topped with chicken.  And ranch dressing.  In Mexico, the salad includes wilty lettuce with a couple of sad tomatoes with a chintzy bit of chicken.  And no ranch dressing.  WTF?  I paid $50 pesos for that crap!  Now if I could only learn to effectively complain in Spanish. 


And the last blah, blah, blah has nothing to do with Reynosa or Mexico.  It's about my Mastercard.  Last November the fraud department called me wanting to know if I charged like $700 to Home Depot in Florida. No, I did not.  At that point it goes to fraud investigations and the credit card is cancelled. They sent me a new card.  I've rarely used the old card in Mexico but I decided I will no longer use the Mastercard in Mexico in case someone is stealing my information.  I get the new card and everything is going along swimmingly when I get another phone call last Thursday wanting to know if I charged like $700 to Home Depot in Florida.  Double WTF?  The same amount from the same store but on my new card.  My card is in my possession and no one else has access to it.  Again, they cancel it to issue me a new one.  And I never, ever used this last one in Mexico. Ever.  But today tops all.  In the middle of class time, the fraud investigator calls me and tells me he has put my new card on hold.  Then he proceeds to treat me like the criminal.  He told me I would have to send picture ID's of everyone in my household.  Uh, that would be ME. He said someone I know has used the card. He tells me that I've been issued a new card 5 times in the past year and that raised a red flag.  I have not been issued a new card 5 times in the past  year so I don't know how he is getting his information. When I questioned him about this he refused to answer me. When I asked what is his name and ID, he refused to supply.  In final frustration, I asked to speak to his supervisor and he refused that and hung up on me.  So now I am thinking, FRAUD, FRAUD!!   When I got home, I called Mastercard and was put through to the fraud department.  Yes, some dickhead named Don did call me from their fraud department that morning.  I put in a formal complaint about him and told them I refuse to deal with him so they better transfer the case to another investigator.  I was promised a supervisor would call me.  Stay tuned for updates. 


UPDATE:  Only 9 of 16 students showed up for the morning class and 12 of 17 for the afternoon class.  Another gun battle last night. This afternoon my students were being pulled out of classes because supposedly 2 university students and 3 teachers have been kidnapped.  As always we only hear rumors.  When will the madness all end?

Best Friends Forever

I have the best friends. I really do.  These are the kind of friends that I can count on for anything.  I want to thank them very much for the "cleaning" they did at my house tonight.  Hey, guys, the candle is still burning. But, dang it, we forgot the tarot cards!  Oh, well, maybe we can get together this weekend and finish what we started. I hope they know if they need ANYTHING, I will be there for them.

Great lyrics from the great movie, Austin Powers.....

Call me.
Don't be afraid, you can
Call me.
Maybe it's late, but just
Call me.
Tell me and I'll be around.


**UPDATE**  That candle was still burning at 6:30 this morning.  What does that mean?  Too much evil to burn away??

Noisy Neighbors and Rotten Tomatoes

As I sit here at 10:44 PM on a Wednesday night listening to my neighbor's noisy party complete with norteño music pumped up to the max, I realize it could be worse.  It could have been one of their karaoke parties with norteño music pumped up to the max while they sing loudly off-key.  I swear one night in the recent past I was picking fruits and vegetables out of my refrigerator so I could start launching missiles from my bedroom window.  That's no joke, folks.  Don't these people realize I have to get up at 5:30 AM?  Do these people care?  Am I asking retarded rhetorical questions? Their parties usually start after 10 PM and can go on until 3 in the morning.

Paybacks can be hell.  Other revenge plots have crossed my mind.  What would they think of loud Czech polka music blaring from my bedroom window at 5:30 AM?  Nah, not a good idea. It sounds too much like norteño music so they'd probably like it. Seriously, folks, the so-called Mexican music with the accordion is not really Mexican at all.  It came from the German and Czech immigrants to northern Mexico.  And the Mexicans have the nerve to brand it as their own!  If you don't believe me, google it.

Anyway, I thought I finally got my revenge last Saturday night at my patio party.  After a couple or ten rounds of tequila (who's counting?) the final encore of the night was a very loud and off-key sing-along with Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody around 2 AM. That oughta fix those noisy neighbors except now my throat hurts and my voice is hoarse. And they are back to partying again. Who got the last laugh?  Not me, I guess, but I've an assortment of tomatoes and oranges ready to be launched.

You Know You've Been In Mexico a While When....

1. the money looks normal and no longer reminds you of Monopoly money.
2. you know where all the potholes are located in your city that are big enough to swallow donkey carts and you can drive creatively to avoid them.
3. seeing a donkey cart no longer makes you stop and stare.
4. you automatically say "gracias" instead of "thank you" even to your English speaking friends.
5. you've developed a taste for salsas with super hot chile peppers.
6. you understand the difference between the 30 taco choices on the menu.
7. you start speaking Spanglish. For example, "Let's go to cama. I'm feeling cansada. La perrita needs to go a fuera so she doesn't hacer pipi en casa."
8. you can read #7 and it makes perfect sense.

Por favor, add your comments. Me gustaría leer todos!

Translated Signs and the Online Translator

These translations made me chuckle. The first two were taken at a tourist site called Mikos in San Luis Potosi.  It is a beautiful place with waterfalls, hiking, kayaking and swimming. But they really need to stop using the online translator.  If I followed the command not to enter the water within an hour or more, I should never enter the water.... ever!  At least that's what the sign said. 








This sign really made me laugh.  How does one lock their car half-assed?  I guess I could just lock the driver's door and leave the rest unlocked.  And please tell me what "forgotten malfunction" means. 













The last photo was taken a few months ago in the bathroom on a bus in Mexico. As I sat on the toilet, this sign stared at me and for the life of me I couldn't understand what it meant. In English.  Oh, duh, flush the toilet!